Crystal Clear

The way I feel about him is crystal clear. 

Truthfully, I could talk about him all day and all night. I would still have a million more things to say about him. Sometimes words can become meaningless so these few words are, he is the most amazing person

I have ever met, I can not imagine my life without him.

He is the first person to make me smile in a while.

And it’s actually real.

He is my first and last thought of ever day.

See the thing is I don’t sleep so I have conversations with the moon. He talks about the sun and I, well I talk about him.

The way his baby blue eyes c

onnect with mine. The way he moves the hair from my face with one hand as the other runs up and down my back. The way he smiles, like holy mother of god. Could he be anymore adorable.

The love I feel for him is indescribable.

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You broke my heart..

The thought of letting go of all the hurt that I feel, how i’m breaking inside because of you! The thought of losing you, never seeing you again or even speaking to you.

Why should i feel like this after everything that you’ve put me through?

Because i actually care about you, because you once were everything to me and now..

Now it feels you’re turning into a small space at the back of my head, all our memories. pushing them to the back of my mind so i can move on except i don’t want to move on because of who you are..

Except to everyone you’re the innocent victim and i’m the bad guy, the one not there, distancing myself away for “no apparent reason” yet i don’t seem to recall you being there when i need you the most.

You ran away, you left, you broke my heart.. a long time ago..

The feeling

It will never go away,

That feeling of wanting to run,

That feeling of heartache,

That feeling of being worthless,

Because little does everyone know,

I’m breaking inside,

The feeling that I’m worthless,

The heartache,

Wanting to run,

I’ve tried,

I’m trying to pick myself up piece by piece.

Underneath it all, I still have that hole inside,

I just need a little more time.