When will you realise

Do I protect my heart from being crushed more times than I can handle and let go?

Or do I continue being treated like I’m not even your daughter?

Either way it’s going to break my heart, but if I let go then maybe I won’t keep getting my hopes up.

Maybe I will realise I’m worth more than how you treat me

This whole year I’ve seen you 3 times.

When will you start acting like my dad… or maybe I’m just dreaming of that happening.

Letting go of being your daughter would start so much grief and trouble that I’ve been doubting it for months. But each time you let me down it gives me more and more reasons to let go…

Each time you give me a reason to believe you don’t deserve me as your daughter

You don’t deserve me constantly trying to be a apart of your life

You don’t deserve me at all

Hell did you even want me?

When will you realise?

Maybe I should let go

Maybe you’ll realise what you’ve done. What you’ve lost. Who you’ve lost.

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Starting my dream

Things are looking up..

With starting my third year at college doing the best thing i know how to do. Production arts isn’t just about learning what is back stage and how they do it. It’s so much more than that..

You aren’t just friends in class, you form this big family who side by side compose this amazing staging, sound, lighting and audiovisual for all the performers for their show. It’s like watching it all come together piece by piece.

It’s amazing to see how much you can accomplish in a short period of time. And how many people are there with you doing what you love even if it’s in a different area of the Production Arts team

Here’s to many more show times of laughter and productivity

You broke my heart..

The thought of letting go of all the hurt that I feel, how i’m breaking inside because of you! The thought of losing you, never seeing you again or even speaking to you.

Why should i feel like this after everything that you’ve put me through?

Because i actually care about you, because you once were everything to me and now..

Now it feels you’re turning into a small space at the back of my head, all our memories. pushing them to the back of my mind so i can move on except i don’t want to move on because of who you are..

Except to everyone you’re the innocent victim and i’m the bad guy, the one not there, distancing myself away for “no apparent reason” yet i don’t seem to recall you being there when i need you the most.

You ran away, you left, you broke my heart.. a long time ago..